MOUSAI

To Some Great Spirit Creator…Whomever You May Be

Kate Van Raden — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 18:07:32 +0000

GRACE:

My courage is a whisper,

My conviction comes and goes,

My love does not move mountains,

I’m consumed by human lows…I’m clumsy with my blessings,

I stumble through my chores,

My virtue is not spotless,

My only glory’s yours. When the landscape seems uncertain;

Full of snares and sin,

My eyes lose sight of sunlight

My faith is sometimes thin…Still I rise each day with purpose;

Share gifts that I possess,

Greet each stranger with a smile,

Meet hate with tenderness.

I try to choose the right from wrong;

Resist boasts when I speak,

I try to walk a steady path,

Though at times my will is weak.

I try to lead with goodness

When the choice is mine to make,

I try to hold a humble heart

And give more than I take. I lift my eyes towards the stars

When I don’t know who I am,

For the strength to be a lion

And the grace to be a lamb…

Inhaling breeze in times of pain,

when my heart is dark with doubt,

I feel some universal love

and breath the sorrow out

The oceans flow beneath my feet,

The forests creak and sway,

the mountains tower around my ears,

the fields sag low with hay,

Behind the doors,

Inside the walls,

Below the windows,

Down the halls…

We feed our children and tuck them in,

We share our sacred lives,

We hold our husbands in our beds

We caress our precious wives,

We steal our private moments,

We confess our secret woes,

We do the daily living

And the worldly loving flows…

By: Kate Van Raden -”Let it flow people, let it flow”

Filed under: Personal

To A Box Of Shirts

Kate Van Raden — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 13:53:42 +0000

You wear white shoes… I forget where I met you. I forget the first time I saw you naked. I forget what we fought about the weekend in April when we went to your parents.

I see your two front teeth when I drink milk. I remember how they hate the cold. I get a whiff of you the subway and cozy up to a warm stranger; just for a moment, just to be with you again. I have a single dress sock that was forgotten under the sink in haste. Sometimes I slip it on and wear it around under my boot all day. I imagine that I glow when I have this secret. I giggle periodically, envisioning how the sandwich artist at the deli would react if he knew I was wearing only one sock… and that it was a size thirteen, argyle, men’s dress sock.

Last night was Tuesday night, so I cooked lasagna. You know how I hate lasagna but we’ve gotten used to having it on Tuesdays after the gym. I find myself cooking it and leaving it on the counter to be devoured by the cats.

I got a call from your sister last week. She was wondering if I still had your box of summer clothes, and if she might have a few shirts for her boys. I lied and said I gave them away. She wouldn’t understand that I still need every single one of them; that I’m so afraid of the day they start to smell like me.

I forgot to remember where I met you…and now I can’t ask.”

Filed under: Personal Tagged: couples, courage, death, faith, image, intimacy, literature, loss, love, poetry, romance, sadness

Blue Lion (Lyin’)

Kate Van Raden — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 12:52:07 +0000

“Blue Lion” poem

I’m layin’ low, stayin’ cool, but I know that you can tell
I’m tryin’ hard to keep my cool although its hell
And my head is bent, my eyes are straight, my steps are strong
And I may not slow, or show I know…but somethin’s wrong.
I’m cool to you, but in the blue my soul’s a fire
I’m lion strong all work day long, ‘cause I can’t afford to tire
I surround myself with vivid dreams, while resisting their attraction
My heart could thrive on other things, but now they’re just distraction
I taste no food, I sleep no winks, I swallow down my doubt
But secretly, behind my eyes, I’m wonderin’ which door is out

Filed under: Personal Tagged: courage, image, literature, poetry, self improvement, transition

A Pun Undone

Kate Van Raden — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 12:41:27 +0000

Live fast,

flash in the pan,

snatch your breaths and clutch them close to breast,

every blink is your stolen treasure. ..

Scribble your dreams in your palm,

write them in ink,

read them often,

add till your whole body’s blue…

Make haste while the sun shines,

count each stitch in time,

love unwisely,

for anything worth doing right is worth enjoying…

Allow yourself to be carried away,

be reckless,

exchange your youth for worldly wisdom and know the trade was good,

tomorrow is a new day…

for one more day

Filed under: poetry Tagged: poetry

The Un-Loving Of You

Kate Van Raden — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 12:32:10 +0000

The Un-Loving of You

by Kate Van Raden

I’m letting you go,
I’m giving you back,
Each bit of your self that I’ve kept…
I returned those eye brows,
and a few of your teeth,
I packed them and hummed as I wept…
I shipped off your thighs in a box with some fingers,
the larger ones only, for now…
When you asked for your shoulders
I blinked back a frown,
But I let you take them,
And some lashes I’d found.
Now, the chuckle was harder,
I was still using that
And without your soft hair,
I just can’t hang my hat
But I do understand that you need these things back
So I try to be gracious, although it’s an act.
The hard part is coming
And I know I’ll feel lost
with no way to smell,
Or to taste, or to talk…
See, I cherish your lips
still so familiar,
and your eyes that melt chocolate for me…
There’s a crook in your nose
that it’s not yours without,
and I’m starting to feel a bit empty…
At last to my treasures
high on a shelf…
to your voice and your skin and your hands,
I hoped I could keep these forever,
but your starting to list your demands…
I can’t bear to imagine the woman who gets these,
I break down each time at the thought.
They’ve been mine for so long,
I just couldn’t tell you
how I’ll go on when they’re not…
Almost nothing is left here
You’ve taken it all
so we’ve parted, I get it, I’ll go…
but I wonder if I could compel you
the compassion to leave me a toe…?

By: Kate Van Raden
http://katevanraden.wordpress.com/

Filed under: Personal Tagged: couples, courage, intimacy, love, poetry, romance, self improvement, Un-Loving

Green Pomegranates

Kate Van Raden — Mon, 26 Dec 2011 22:32:05 +0000

”Green Pomegranates” poem

Now I lay me down to weep
Bleed my soul dry
Drowned the sheep.
Cut the wires that make me dance,
Bind my feet
And then my hands.
Break the mask that hides my face,
Suck down poison
Deny my race
Lick fruit from the serpent’s tongue,
Turn inside out
Then come undone.
Inhale that fire that sucks you dry
Lose an ear
So take an eye,
Bury peaches partly peeled
Reopen wounds
That freshly healed
Patch the tares with lies,
Cauterize nerve endings
Feed the flies
Cry out from crinkled lungs,
Shatter silence
Burst eardrums.
Tighten up your skin
Trap your fear behind a grin

Filed under: Personal Tagged: Background, courage, image, literature, poetry, spiritual

Day Break

Kate Van Raden — Mon, 26 Dec 2011 22:20:10 +0000

“Day Break” poem

Steam rises of my soggy skin
And tumbles through the air
A sigh escapes from deep within
And weaves itself through tangled hair
The morning creeps across the earth
Song birds bathe in dew
I watch the day break’s painful birth
And all I think about is you.
The world begins again today
I sit still and see it start
Sun rays split the stony gray
And warm my frozen heart
Sleeping bumbles wake to life
They stretch their glossy wings
I’m reminded that me all have wings
And dreams and precious things…

Filed under: Personal Tagged: At Sea, courage, faith, literature, poetry, self improvement, spiritual

Life Swirls

Kate Van Raden — Mon, 26 Dec 2011 15:39:27 +0000

“Life Swirls” poem
Be gentle in the world,
People need kindness…
We are so many broken winged doves,
So many down trodden saints…
Great masses of starving orphans
Hungry for a smile or a scrap of grace;
To each their own private wounds…
But may the trail you stumble
One day end at a warm bed,
And a glass of milk…
And may you never lose sight of the sky…

Filed under: poetry

YOU-Nique

Kate Van Raden — Mon, 19 Sep 2011 18:37:56 +0000

I like the smell of you,
The smell is the tell of you,
How I know if you’re bright or blue,
How I knew that the love was true…

I can only sleep, when in your bed
Only bury my face in your head
If I’ve never said it,
Now it’s been said
Your aroma’s the thing that turns my blood red.

When you leave, I stay all day in your clothes
I wear them and wear them until the scent goes,
And if you’re long gone, God only knows…
I’ll be hot on your trail as soon the wind blows.

Filed under: Personal

Ellipses

Kate Van Raden — Tue, 06 Sep 2011 23:48:25 +0000

Clocks shatter across the walls

our house is crumbling.

I saw that look on your face,

the morning we woke up with the roof around our bed…

that look that says ‘Trouble is coming, and this isn’t it’.

Filed under: Personal